Saturday, November 14, 2020

 


Preparing to Give Thanks 


"It is what it is." If we can find ways to give thanks for it, whatever it may be, we can transform it. 


The words, "It is what it is," 

  are not always received kindly, 

    and they may or may not be intended kindly, 

      but they can form a useful expression. 


They can be used to refer 

  to the importance of accepting reality. 


All too often, those who like to say, 

  "It is what it is," 

    are not too fond of accepting reality. 


I can think of one notable example 

  that I'm resisting mentioning by name. 


Learning to accept reality 

  is an important life skill 

    at any stage of our lives. 


We cannot begin to cope with or change our reality 

  without first accepting that it is the way it is 

    right now, as things really are. 


On the other hand, too much acceptance 

  can disable us just as much 

    as trying to deny reality. 


I can also think of some examples 

  of too much acceptance, 

    and for now, those, too, 

      will remain unnamed. (like a lot of Senators...) 


It is possible to accept reality 

  and still work to change what we can change. 


The traditional Japanese art of acceptance (ukeireru)

  seeks to achieve a balance

    between accepting things as they are 

      and working to change what we can. 


Acceptance of what is 

  can be understood as a deeply important part 

    of traditional Japanese culture. 


It has played an important role 

  in Japan's ability to maintain an orderly society 

    in all kinds of circumstances. 


Balance is still the key, 

  accepting what is, 

    without so much resignation 

      that it is disabling. 


Like all attempts to achieve balance, 

  success in balancing acceptance 

    and working for change 

     is limited. 


We can overcome those limits 

  by moving forward without giving up. 


It is possible, but not easy, 

  to work for change 

    while seeing our own limitations clearly. 


In terms of our society and culture 

  as well as the unfolding of history, 

    we are in a time of transition, 

      and I'm not just talking about 

        the official transition 

          from one administration to another. 


Of course, I feel the need to say a little bit 

  about the official transition 

    since it's so much on our minds

      even though I'm studiously trying 

        not to name names. 


Much of what we are seeing in the U.S. right now

  is performance art, a kind of shock opera. 


All of that and the chaos it is producing 

  will come to an end. 


The good news is that the chaos can't 

  - and won't - 

    last forever


Keeping such great good news in mind 

  is a matter of important perspective for us all. 


Perspective is a form of balance for us, 

  especially these days. 


We all have long understood 

  that this period would not be easy for any of us, 

    no matter how things turned out. 


As a recent social media meme has said, 

  "Anyone hoping for a peaceful transition 

    has never had to pull a toddler 

      out of a Chuck E. Cheese." (children's pizza place) 


I'll just let that analogy stand on its own 

  as a kind of social commentary.


More importantly, 

  we are in a time of rapid change and transition 

    in our society. 


Many people are finding the speed 

  and the extent of  change 

    to be personally challenging and even threatening. 


The social transition is the result 

  of rapid change of many forms. 


New kinds of relationships are forming. 


New ways of relating to people 

  with whom we disagree 

    are becoming a survival skill, 

      at least in terms of meaningful progress. 


Meaningful progress is turning out to be 

  a survival skill on many levels. 


In my most recent sermon (Living Memory on 11/1), 

  I said, 


"We are in a time of transition, 

  and we can often see ourselves and our world 

    in new ways when things are changing. 


This principle of seeing in new ways applies 

  to individual people, 

    to nations and societies, 

      and to the situations in which we find ourselves."


Those words have turned out to be 

  even more obviously true 

    than any of us could have known 

      when I first spoke them 

        two weeks ago. 


The presidential election and its aftermath 

  have created a new perspective 

    on the prospects for change. 


Even though a new president will take office 

  on January 20, 2021, 

    the people of this country will definitely not agree 

      about what the new presidency will mean. 


It will even be difficult 

  for the new president to get full support 

    from his own political party. 


He is clearly in the middle - 

  in my view, more center than center left - 

    so people more on the left will not be pleased 

      by many of his policies. 


On the other hand, 

  this does not need to stand in the way 

    of our preparing to give thanks. 


It is what it is! 


Moving forward may be a better possibility 

  for those standing very much in the middle 

    of the society he and she are trying to serve. 


I'm saying he and she because I already see 

  Biden and Harris 

    as necessarily a team. 


As we are preparing to give thanks 

  for new hopes and possibilities, 

    I find it necessary to mention a few warnings. 


The process will not be - and cannot be - easy. 


We associate giving thanks 

  with the traditional holiday and Holy Day 

    of Thanksgiving. 


It is an especially important holy day 

  for UU's. 


This year's Thanksgiving will not look like 

  any other Thanksgiving celebration 

    in the nation's history. 


In the first place, 

  the pandemic of COVID-19, 

    so much in an outbreak phase right now, 

      has prevented most of the gatherings 

        of families and friends 

          to which we have been accustomed. 


In addition, 

  there are people inside and outside the U.S. 

    who are determined to use a time of chaos 

      to produce even more instability. 


I do not say these things to encourage pessimism. 


As you know, I'm an incurable optimist. 


I just find it absolutely necessary, 

  especially for myself, 

    to seek balance for my optimism 

      with healthy doses of realism. 


Only as we look at things the way they are 

  as far as we can understand them 

    will we be able to transform them 

      to allow for the new hopes 

        we are holding so dear. 


One of my hopes for this time of change 

  is that our perspective on Thanksgiving itself 

    can be transformed. 


Our national UU leaders are working diligently 

  to help us all understand 

    that some of the mythology 

      surrounding the origins of the holiday 

        are not only historically inaccurate, 

          they may be actively hurtful 

            to people of the First Nations, 

              and that has been true for centuries. 


We are thankful for our time and place 

  in this land, 

    but many others have been displaced 

      by our presence. 


This understanding need not diminish our gratitude, 

  but it can expand it, 

    so that we are grateful to so many others 

      whose lives among and around us 

        have made our lives possible. 


Such a new understanding 

  can help us find new perspectives 

    and thus new ways of balancing 

      our understanding about what is 

        and what our reality needs to become. 


Soren Kierkegaard, one of the founding fathers 

  of the philosophical school 

    that would become known 

      as existentialism, wrote, 

"There are two ways of being fooled. 

  One is to believe what isn't true. The other is 

    to refuse to accept what is true." 


Neither one works, and in our time 

  it is especially potentially damaging 

    to be unable to say, "It is what it is," 

      while maintainting a perspective on reality. 


There is a profoundly positive 

  and optimistic corollary to the statement, 

    "It is what it is." 


The optimistic statement says, 

  "It's all good." 


To say it that way 

  may well seem much too optimistic. 


It's intended simply to refocus our attention

   at least that's what I mean by it. 


What this saying can do is enable us 

  to look at our present situations 

    without value judgments. 


Good vs. bad can feel threatening. 


There is always a higher good, 

  and it's possible in any time and place 

    to look for that. 


The higher good provides a goal 

  as well as hope for better situations. 


As 2020 is reaching its conclusion, 

  new goals and new hopes 

    can be especially  important. 


If we can focus on the new possibilities, 

  we really can begin to transform our situations, 

    here and now and into a promising, 

      hope filled future. 


Amen. 


So let it be. 


Blessed be.