Saturday, June 06, 2020


Social Closeness

We all need each other. Physical distance need not blind us to this need. We are learning to stay close despite the challenges.


In the midst of the current pandemic and panic,
  there is a term that I've grown very tired of:
    social distance.

I understand the importance of PHYSICAL distance
  in order to reduce the risks of contagion.

Social distance has to be a different matter,
  at least in the way that I'm thinking of it.

To me, the term social distance
  could imply emotional distance
    between people,
      or distance in terms of caring about each other.

That would mean caring about each other best
  at a distance,
    or it might mean not caring very much at all.

The reality is that we need a lot more caring
  about each other.

Events all over the U.S.
  - and in other parts of the world -
    in the last couple of weeks
      tell us clearly that we do not need
        more social distance.

We need more social closeness.

We need more understanding among people
  who may be very different from each other.

Physical distance has been difficult to achieve
  as people have tried to express
    their grief and their grievances
      regarding the ways the larger society
        has treated them and their families.

Physical distance is no less important
  as it has become more difficult.

It may be that it's becoming even more important
  as we try to move forward
    into more opportunities to go out of our homes
      and do more things that need to be done.

Part of the problem with physical distance
  is that it is closely related to privileges
    in our society and in many other societies.

Staying at home is simply not possible
  for too many of our people.

Minorities and the poor
  have borne the brunt of the pandemic
    very nearly across the board,
      not only in terms of the disease itself
        and the lack of adequate medical care,
          but also in terms of their over-representation
            in the jobs that have been designated
              as essential.

As essential workers,
  their exposure to the dangers of contagion
    have been greatly increased.

Not all essential workers are underprivileged,
  but many of them are.

As we depend on them,
  so it is up to us to protect them

We all will have to work together
  to achieve a balance
    between physical distance to protect us
      and social closeness to enable us
        to care about each other in effective ways.

Caring about each other
  is rapidly becoming an important survival skill.

A theme banner
  for the Anglican diocese of Niagara
    in Ontario, Canada
      for this Pride week
        carried the caption, "Fiercely Loved."

We all need to know and feel
  that we are fiercely loved. 

Fierce love
  on a personal level
    and on a social level
      implies much more closeness than distance.

The closeness is as much a moral matter
  as it is an emotional matter,
    maybe even more so.

Our sense of caring for each other
  is a powerful force in our society
    as well as our families.

It is one of the ways that our congregation
  has become a beloved community for us.

It's something that we truly cannot live without.

That's true, not only because it's needed for survival
  but also because it provides us with better reasons
    to want to survive.

In our time fierce love is likely to take
  the form of healing.

Healing can indeed be an expression of love.

From a certain point of view,
  healing can only take place
    in the presence of love
      in one form or another,
        and the best form of love for healing
          may well be fierce love.

Our society as a whole is in need of healing
  on a profound level.

It's not just racism and prejudice
  that need to be healed.   

We need healing from the apathy
  that creates genuine social distance among us
    as it has always done.

Apathy is like a magnetic force that repels, 
    as it pushes people apart.

You see, magnetism can work both ways.

It can attract, and it can repel.

The events of our times are like that.

They can draw us together,
  or they can push us apart.

At first glance, 
  it may seem inevitable that our these events
    will push us apart.

After all, the world-wide pandemic
  makes physical separation necessary
    for the well being of all of us,
      especially for those who are most vulnerable.

At the same time,
  the physcial separation is being done
    for the protection and the well being of all of us,
      again, especially for those
        who are most vulnerable among us.

There is no way we can work
  for everyone's well being
    while continuing to live the way we used to live.

Many places, including our own,
  are trying to reopen,
    trying to return to something
      that feels more normal,
        and it is my fond hope
          that we are not doing so prematurely.

At the same time
  many people are gathering in public,
    at considerable risk to themselves,
      to express their desire to protect people
        who are vulnerable in a very different way.

Minorities and those who are different from others
  are especially vulnerable in hard times.

It's easy to look for scapegoats
  or to try to find someone
    whose suffering is greater than one's own
      just to help ourselves to feel better.

Scapegoating and gloating over others' misfortune
  are certainly false comforts,
    and the more we humans try to indulge in them,
      the more clearly we can see
        how illusory they are.

Please note that I said,
  "The more clearly we CAN see it,"
  but we don't necessarily see what we can see.

Sometimes the things
  that might be the most obvious to us
    are the last things we actually see.

The oppression of minorities
  is all too often invisible to those in the majority.

In our exceptional times,
  the situation may have become entirely different.

With so many people staying at home,
  working and studying from home,
    many activities are difficult or even impossible.

I've heard the theory
  that the present circumstances
    have sensitized us to the sufferings of others.

It may just be that more of us are seeing things
  that have been happening all along,
    like the torture and death of George Floyd.

The fact of having been so cooped up for so long
  may also have contributed to the actions
    of so many people in going out to protest.

In any case,
  our culture is at a turning point.

We have the opportunity to turn
  in a direction of more caring,
    more social closeness.

Sadly, there are also forces and people
  trying to turn us toward deeper social distance
    and alienation.

I cannot claim to know the end result,
  but we are at an important time of choosing.

The direction we will go as a society
  will not be determined by elections alone,
    nor by  protestors or troops in the streets alone.

There will have to be thousands of individual choices
  that will determine the overall direction
    of our communities, states, nations,
      and even the planet as a whole.

You and I have tremendous power
  in the things we choose to think, say, and do.

We really can make a difference,
  even as we are living with physical distance
    from each other.

My hope and desire
  is that you and I will make the positive choice,
    so that our social closeness
      across all kinds of barriers
        may prevail over social distance
          from now on.

Amen.
Let it be.
Blessed be!

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